Techniques to motivate children to make lasting behavior changes are easier to encourage than many parents think. Sure, any change is difficult but there are ways to make it a little easier and more successful.

Following is a menu of six tools sure to get you and your kids going. By no means will every parent utilize every one, but instead you will want to pick and choose what works best for your family and your kids.

1. Modeling: One of the most powerful ways that children learn behavior is through observation. Studies have shown that parental participation in physical activity is positively related to child participation. Parents, however, are not the only models in a child’s life. Peers, teachers, and mentors all can serve in this role. As a matter of fact, experts say that all of these different groups affect a child’s attitude and conduct. For instance, a study looking at fruit and vegetable consumption among children in grades 4 through 6 showed not only parental modeling to be correlated to consumption but that peer influence played a significant role as well. This means that children were more likely to eat fruits and vegetables when others around them were eating them, too.¹ While positive behaviors should be modeled, unwanted behaviors should not. A child will notice very quickly any inconsistencies between what they are being asked to do and what we are doing ourselves. Anyone serving as a role model should call attention to their own good behaviors whenever possible in order to encourage children to imitate those good health habits.

Example: Take a 10-minute walk around your housing complex or neighborhood everyday when you get home from work, if it is safe to do so. The consistency will enforce the importance of daily activity to your child.

2. Praise: Praise is an expression of approval and commendation. Children are constantly seeking attention, which makes praise a very powerful motivational tool. Praise for a certain behavior must be specific and given as soon as the activity is noticed. This makes the connection between the two immediate and memorable. Remember, any attention is considered desirable in a child’s eye and therefore it is important that you praise positive behaviors more than you criticize negative ones.

Example: When you notice that your child chooses to play an active game rather than turn on the TV, be sure to commend him on his choice with phrases such as, “I am so proud of you for playing,” or “Good decision to play instead of watch TV,” or “What a clever game you came up with to play. You have a great imagination.” When your child helps with a physical household chore, be sure to say: “You are truly a hard worker and a big help to this family.”

3. Contracting: Contracting involves having a child earn privileges by meeting the specified goals of targeted behavior changes. The focus is on the behavior (i.e., walking to the park) rather than the outcome (i.e., losing weight) and the privilege given, reinforces the behavior. It is important that the privilege or reward be for something other than food, money, or gifts.

Example: Every time your child engages in a positive behavior such as riding her bike instead of playing a video game, give her a predetermined number of gold stars. Once she accumulates a certain number of stars, she earns a privilege, such as being able to choose a family outing for the coming week. The privilege is the choice. You as a parent control the choices, so that it can be a trip to the park to fly a kite, for instance, or swimming at the local YMCA pool. Both choices are activity-based and both include the whole family. This kind of decision making empowers the child.

4. Fostering Understanding and Awareness: Successful behavior change occurs when children understand the benefits of positive behaviors, as well as the consequences of negative behaviors. Children want and need to know the “why.” They like to know that there is a reason behind their actions so that they do not believe they are being targeted or unjustly scrutinized. They are much more likely to participate in change if they know they will receive something in return.

Example: After your latest health exam, go over the test results with your child and explain how your positive lifestyle behaviors may have affected the outcome. Or, gather materials from BAM! Body and Mind , the CDC’s program for children. Review them with your child.

5. Self-Monitoring: Self-monitoring is a technique that utilizes record keeping. You and your child track positive behavior in journals, charts, or another form. The gold-star example explained above is a good example of this. Self-monitoring lets the child assess his or her progress and serves as an excellent motivational tool. When children can “see” their efforts, they have an increase in confidence, and are inspired to continue. Further, they will be inspired to make more changes. When children take an active role in monitoring their positive behaviors, and when parents praise them along the way, children get a sense of ownership of the change, as well as a feeling of being in control.

Example: Give your child an activity chart and post it in the open, on the refrigerator or family bulletin board. With your child, designate symbols for various activities, such as a bike, a jump rope, grass (to signify outdoor play), or stairs. At the end of each day, your child can mark off the amount of time spent doing various activities.

6. Substituting Alternatives: This is a way to replace negative health habits with positive ones. The value in this technique is that typically it does not require any extra effort because one behavior is simply replaced with another. By providing children with choices and options, you increase their chances of making lasting changes.

Example: Your child can substitute a computer game with a bike ride or an active game in the apartment courtyard.

¹ Cullen, K.W. Baranoski, T., Rittenberry, L., Cosart, C., Herbert, D & de Moor, C. Child reported family and peer influences on fruit, juice and vegetable consumption: reliability and validity of measures. Health Educ Res. 2001, April:16(2): 187-200.

Gina Cortese is associate director, Division of Education, The Cooper Institute.